A Real Post: Our House Rules

In seeking parental advice from my pediatrician bro-in-law, he suggested a book by Supernanny.  So I got the book, and have watched some of the episodes from the TV show.  Not only did I get to listen to a fancy British accent, I gleaned some parenting tactics that I want to try.  Supernanny is all about structure, and she says posting "house rules" will help your kids know what behavior is expected of them.  So ours have been crafted.  Here was my strategy: 

I wanted positive rules.
I wanted action-oriented rules.
I wanted catchy, easy to remember rules.
I wanted few rules, but rules with breadth and meaning.



I chose five rules because we have five members of our family, and five fingers on a hand, making it easy for little kids to list.  I added the cut-out pictures next to each rule since my kids don't read yet, and although Kate has all of the rules memorized, she needs little prompts to be able to list them aloud consecutively.  Ha, ha, I just realized that the broom representing "cleaning" also resembles a toilet plunger.  I might have to pull the scissors out again.  :) 

In addition to the general criteria, here is why I chose our specific rules:


1.  Show Love: Our ultimate goal is to become like Jesus Christ and to develop love like His.  Also, we want the atmosphere of our home to be full of love and happiness.

2. Help, Don't Hurt: I took a class in college by Dr. Lynn Scoresby, a marriage and family therapist, and a favorite professor of mine back in the day.  He taught that when you are teaching your kids how to choose between right and wrong, don't just provide a list of "rules" to follow...  they need to have a deeper understanding of why something is right or wrong.  He suggested that we should teach our children that a moral choice is one that helps, not hurts, others.  Of course as your kids get older, you also have to teach a true doctrine-based understanding of what truly helps, and what truly hurts.  But the concept of "Help, Don't Hurt" can even be understood as a child.   It was also great way for me to say  "Don't hit!" with a positive spin. :).  And having "Help" listed first gives me a way to praise the kids for keeping the rule.

3. Use Kind Words: aka "Don't be whiny."  Ha ha.  It's really more than that, but that's why it made it in the list.  It's supposed to convey respect and politeness, and stressing the point that we are responsible for our words.  We choose what we talk about.  We use words that help.

4.  Work Hard and Happy.  I hear hard work is good for ya'.  That's what Rob says anyway.  And I added the "happy" which not only makes it catchy, it makes work sound fun, right? ;)  I want us to work happy. 

5.  Be Clean:  This is for you, Rob.  I am not organized by nature.  But, I hold out hope for my kids, so we're making an effort.  Truly though, when the house is clean, it is more peaceful and enjoyable.  I've noticed when there is stuff all over my kitchen island, I feel frazzled.  But when it is clean and shiny, I meet my duties with more enthusiasm and cheerfulness.  


The rules have been posted for a little less than a week, and I have to say Kate at 5-years-old is the perfect age for this.  She truly enjoys learning the rules, and she has a loving nature so the way they are phrased really makes it a positive thing.  And it helps me when I am looking for ways to praise or  explain discipline because I can refer back to the rules. 

Next Project:  A posted daily schedule.  Ha ha ha ha.  But it's really going to happen. 




Side note about the picture of our family:  I drew the pic, then scanned it into Photoshop.  I was playing around with the color, and Kate insisted she be the one to color in the people.  I prepared myself for a struggle because Photoshop is not known for user-friendliness, and 5-year-olds are not known for patience.  We trade places, she grabs the mouse, I look a way for a minute, I turn back---she's already got the color picker up, and she's changing the shade!  She had watched me for like 2 minutes.  And then my 5-year-old was Photoshopping.  I had to instruct her a little after that, but seriously she was rocking it.